


Rewrite the Stars

by Fangirling_FTW



Series: Destiel One-Shots [32]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst with a Happy Ending, Cas has family issues, Dean is adorable, First Kiss, Fluff, I don’t know what to tag, M/M, Mild Angst, Pining, Reluctant Cas, dancer!cas, dancer!dean
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-02
Updated: 2020-02-02
Packaged: 2021-02-27 20:13:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,673
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22531525
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fangirling_FTW/pseuds/Fangirling_FTW
Summary: The newest, and quite attractive member of the dance company is enamored with Cas. Too bad Cas can’t return his feelings. Can one routine change his mind?
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester
Series: Destiel One-Shots [32]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/374717
Comments: 22
Kudos: 94





	Rewrite the Stars

**Author's Note:**

> Hi I haven’t written much of anything since getting pregnant so I’m polishing off my skills with this soft little one shot. Let’s see if I remember how to do this whole writing thing. <3

Castiel is sweaty, smelly, sapped, and probably a whole other load of alliterative adjectives. He’s alone in the gym at least, the only one who’s strange night owl routine puts his workout in the hour before the place closes. The solitude means focus, and with Freeform Dance Company’s winter recital coming up in two weeks he needs all the focus he can get.

For some reason his good friend and dance partner Donna decided they needed to sign up to do a big feature number this year, an epic highlighted duo routine. While she acquiesced to Cas’ insistence they at least don’t use Christmas music, he’s still not entirely excited about it. It’s not that he’s lacking confidence in his ability, or that he’s nervous about the focus from the audience, he’s proud of the work he put in to overcome those insecurities. Cas just… doesn’t like drawing attention to himself. He’s good enough to be one of the lead dancers at the company, and he’s happy with that. To be featured like this isn’t his thing. 

Even more surprising was that the extremely talented new male dancer, a cocky young guy named Dean, that had joined the company that year wasn’t doing a solo or duo piece at this recital. Generally new talent gets the chance to be featured, to introduce them to the audience of season ticket holders as it were. Dean is a nice guy, Cas spent some time getting to know him when he first arrived. A lot of their life experiences matched up pretty well, almost too many of them honestly.

Cas finishes his curling reps with the dumbbells he was using and puts them back, shaking out his arms and stretching, savoring the burn of well used muscles.

“About to lock up, Cas.” The desk attendant, a beautiful powerhouse of a woman named Billie, calls to him. She’s quickly become a friend since she was hired on at the gym to cover the closing shift, someone outside the dance community Cas can confide in.

“Just finished.” He grabs his gym bag and heads towards the exit. 

“Gonna hit the showers tonight?”

“Nah, I can wait till I get home.” She nods, tugging on her jacket as Cas does the same. “You coming to the recital?” he asks as they head for the door.

“Wouldn’t miss it for the world.” She turns off the lights, walking to the door with Cas who stops to wait for her as she sets the alarm and locks up. “I saw a picture of the new guy in your group, some real eye candy.” Her voice is casual but Cas knows her intentions are anything but. He blames the flush on his cheeks on his post workout heat and the chilly air that seeps through his clothes.

“I hadn’t noticed.”

“Which is why I’m sure you haven’t been talking about him for the past month.”

“Billie, I can’t, ok?” Cas sighs. “One, he’s in the company and that is just begging for drama I don’t want. Two, the holidays are stressful enough without…” Cas’ throat seizes up, like he’s allergic to even finishing that sentence.

“I’ve told you time and again, my family would have you over for the holiday in a heartbeat. We may be pagans, but that just means we throw one hell of a better party.” 

“It’s not that simple,” Cas sighs heavily, a visual puff of air escaping into the cold night. “I’m lucky they even want to see me at all, given my career choice. I’m not about to make it any worse by even considering dating a co-worker. Let alone a  _ male  _ coworker.” 

“Suit yourself,” Billie shrugs. They reach their cars, parked in their usual spots next to each other, and Billie pauses before getting in, giving Cas a knowing look over the top of her car. “You know, you say you’re happy, but I really think you’re missing the bigger picture here.”

“The bigger picture?” Cas chuckles. “What would that be exactly?”

“That you’re not.” With a smirk and a wave she climbs into her car, the cold driving Cas to do the same. He gets the heater running, defrosting his windshield as he tries to ignore the tiny seed of doubt she’s placed in his head.

***

_ One Week Later _

“C’mon Cas, where is your head today?” Donna sighs. It was the third time he’d almost dropped her, missing a crucial step in the routine and throwing himself off balance. They’d been in rehearsal for 45 minutes and were getting nowhere.

“Sorry, I’m sorry.” He runs a hand through his mop of sweaty hair, closing his eyes to try and find his focus. 

“You know this routine,” Donna continues, in a more soothing voice. “Only person who learns faster than you is Dean.” At the mention of his name Cas’ eyes snap open. Dean had built the reputation for watching a routine once and learning it. Cas knows it’s not true, he’s watched him in group a few times and seen the small mistakes, but even Cas has to admit Dean’s good, really good. The ‘annoyingly effortless grace as he moves that makes even professionals like Cas jealous’ kind of good.

“You know I’m not a fan of these solos,” Cas sighs. “I guess my brain is fighting back.” 

“Okie dokie.” She examines him for a minute, her gaze steady and knowing. “Imma take a quick break, okay? Let your brain do it’s thing.” She squeezes his arm affectionately as she walks by, leaving Cas alone in the studio. He waits for a moment in the silence, berating himself for his distraction. 

“Focus, it’s not that hard,” he mutters to himself as he gets a drink of water and restarts the music, moving to the center of the room and closing his eyes. As the music plays, he goes through the motions of Donna’s side of the routine, trying to figure out what he’s missing from his own.

He loses himself quickly in the movement and music, like he always does, miming the partner parts of the dance as best he can. Eyes still closed, he starts to approach the part of the routine he’s been stumbling over and hardly even notices when someone’s hands come up from behind, taking hold of him and completing his part of the routine as he moves through Donna’s, effortlessly catching him at the dip where he’s been stumbling. Satisfied that he’s figured out what he was doing wrong, Cas opens his eyes.

Dean Winchester is standing there, holding him with a smirk on his face. For the smallest moment Cas simply stays there, wrapped in strong, sturdy arms and feeling safe, but the moment passes as Dean’s smirk falters into something  _ else.  _ Cas springs up and away from him with an extremely undignified yelp, turning off the music.

“You really do get lost in the dance, don’t you?” Dean chuckles. “I mean, I’ve watched you.” There’s a pause, something awkward on his freckled face. “You know, from time to time, just around the studio and stuff. It’s uh, it’s kinda beautiful.” Cas hopes the blush he feels creeping up his cheeks isn’t too obvious.

“Yeah, well, still kind of rude to sneak in like that.” Cas grabs his water bottle and takes a long drink. Any excuse to keep his gaze turned away.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you.” Dean at least has the grace to sound genuinely sorry, and Cas’ anger ebbs a little. “I was actually looking for Donna.”

“She took a break,” Cas waves vaguely at the door. 

“Ah, okay, I’ll catch up with her later.” Dean shifts on his feet, and Cas braces himself for what he knows is coming, for what’s already happened so many times before in the three months Dean has been with them. “I uh, could apologize for the scare with a drink later, if you’re interested?” Cas hates this, hates turning him down every time he asks with those hopeful green eyes and the tiny smile.

“I’m sorry, Dean, I just can’t.” Cas doesn’t have a good excuse this time, he’s thrown in the towel when it comes to excuses why he won’t take this charming, kind, beautiful man up on his offer of a date.

“Yeah, I know, but you can’t fault a guy for trying.” Dean’s smirk fades a little, the confident dancer replaced with the shy guy out of Kansas. “I...look, it doesn’t have to be a date, ok? I just want to spend some time with you, even if we can’t…”

“Maybe after the holiday,” Cas finally concedes, even if he knows he’s lying. Cas can’t do  _ just friends  _ either.

“Hey Dean!” Donna enters the room, cutting the tension and drawing Dean’s eyes away from Cas. Grateful for the distraction, Cas walks off to the side to stretch and drink more water as they talk.

“So I am a go for movie night tomorrow…” Cas tunes out Dean’s excited voice, the sound of the easy friendship between him and Donna, but he can’t stop his eyes from watching them in the wall length mirror. Something he could easily have if it weren’t for… well a lot of things. When Dean leaves, Donna walks up behind Cas slowly, resting her hand on his elbow and her head on his shoulder.

“Why do you keep saying no?” she asks, uncharacteristically quiet. He meets her eyes in the mirror, shaking his head.

“You know why.”

“Cas, it’s your life.”

“I’m dancing aren’t I? I’m doing what I wanted to do.”

“Yeah, but that’s not everything, is it?” Cas pulls away from Donna with an exasperated sigh.

“Why is everyone convinced I need to go out with him?” Cas steps into the center of the room, stretching a little more and taking his stance to start their routine. “Is it really worth alienating my family? Of revisiting freaking trauma over a handful of dates that may not even go anywhere?”

“Is it worth pretending you don’t want those dates, especially with Dean, more than you want to spend a few stuffy dinners at your parent’s house?” Donna counters, stepping into her own starting position.

Cas doesn’t answer. But they do nail the routine perfectly.

***

_ One Week Later _

“What do you mean, you’re going to be late?” Cas snaps. A small group of high school aged dancers fall silent and slowly move away from where Cas is pacing in the green room.

“I mean there’s a gigantic truck blocking the road and I won’t get there in time for our number.” Donna’s voice is stressed, and concern for her safety overrides Cas’ need to vent his frustration.

“Fine just, get here safely,” he sighs. “I’ll try and figure something out.”

“You know, there is one other person who knows the routine. Just saying.”

Cas’ heart stops as Donna hangs up the phone.

_ No.  _ It’s completely not fair. Not after the past week of dress rehearsals and close quarters in the green room and always seeming to bump into a firm chest and green eyes wherever he goes. A week of looking out into the auditorium and catching those same green eyes watching him with open adoration and giving him positive criticism with a side of genuine compliments. 

He did  _ not  _ want to do this routine, to this music, with Dean. And he’s starting to hate the color green.

Maybe he could salvage this with an old solo routine, there has to be something he knows that matches the music-

“Cas, ten minutes.” The assistant director’s voice leaves him with a sense of dread buried in his gut. 

He doesn’t have a choice.

He makes his way through the crowded green room, finding Dean and dragging him by the arm out into the backstage hallway. Dean’s dressed in a simple forest green unitard and pants, what’s going to go under a costume for a later number, but it’ll do with Cas’ royal blue outfit.

“Cas, what-“

“Do you know Donna’s half of our routine?” Cas hisses quietly.

“Yeah, I do-“ Cas cuts Dean off by moving behind him and taking hold of his waist. His hands grow warm as he adjusts his grip and he tries to remind himself this is purely professional.

“Jump,” he commands, thankfully with no shake in his voice. With two prep counts Dean does and Cas lifts, managing to get his arms straight above his head before letting Dean down. “Okay, we can still do the lift as is. Get ready, we’re on stage in five.” Without pausing to listen to what Dean’s frantically trying to say behind him, Cas takes off for his side of the stage, walking quietly to his starting position and doing some stretches just to keep himself distracted.

When the number before theirs ends, Cas takes in a deep breath, letting it out slowly, and walks out onto the dark stage. He can just make out Dean’s shadow across from him, but he closes his eyes and focuses. 

Just do the routine. Use the muscle memory and get this done.

The music starts to play as the lights come up and Cas starts to move.

_ You know I want you. _

_ It’s not a secret I try to hide. _

_ I know you want me, _

_ So don’t keep saying our hands are tied. _

For the first part of the routine Cas is the more active one, moving around Dean, just light touches that Dean reacts to, but when they make eye contact Cas forgets that they’re not alone in the studio anymore.

_ You claim it’s not in the cards. _

_ Fate is pulling you miles away _

_ And out of reach from me. _

_ But you’re here in my heart, _

_ So who can stop me if I decide _

_ That you’re my destiny? _

The first bit of active couple dancing begins as the chorus does, consisting mostly of Cas holding on to Dean and Dean trying to let go. The dips and twists are smooth, like they’ve been the ones rehearsing this for weeks.

_ What if we rewrite the stars? _

_ Say you were made to be mine. _

_ Nothing could keep us apart. _

_ You'd be the one I was meant to find. _

_ It's up to you, and it's up to me. _

_ No one can say what we get to be _

_ So why don't we rewrite the stars? _

_ Maybe the world could be ours _

_ Tonight. _

Cas’ turn to be passive comes, and he loses himself watching Dean dance around him. Movements that Donna made so beautiful Dean executes in an equally gorgeous way, bringing strength to the dance and calling up an emotional response out of Cas he wasn’t expecting.

_ You think it's easy? _

_ You think I don't want to run to you? _

_ But there are mountains _

_ And there are doors that we can't walk through. _

_ I know you're wondering why, _

_ Because we're able to be _

_ Just you and me _

_ Within these walls. _

_ But when we go outside _

_ You're going to wake up and see  _

_ That it was hopeless after all. _

They move into the push and pull movements again, every step and move executed flawlessly, and Cas has never had a performance that felt so exhilarating. Dancing with Dean is something else entirely; he could do this forever and never get tired.

_ No one can rewrite the stars. _

_ How can you say you'll be mine? _

_ Everything keeps us apart _

_ And I'm not the one you were meant to find. _

_ It's not up to you. _

_ It's not up to me. _

_ When everyone tells us what we can be, _

_ How can we rewrite the stars? _

_ Say that the world can be ours _

_ Tonight _

The push and pull gives way to a series of small lifts and jumps, interspersed with moments of intimate closeness. Cas can hardly breathe, and not from exertion.

_ All I want is to fly with you. _

_ All I want is to fall with you. _

_ So just give me all of you. _

The lift is coming up, and they separate, moving to opposite sides of the stage. They make eye contact and Cas nods slightly, Dean’s slight nod back in response a silent ‘I trust you’.

_ It feels impossible. _

_ (it's not impossible) _

_ Is it impossible? _

_ Say that it's possible. _

As soon as the last ‘possible’ starts Dean crosses the distance in long bounding steps and leaps into the lift, Cas catching him and raising him up to shoulder level in a spin before fluidly lowering him down again.

_ How do we rewrite the stars? _

_ Say you were made to be mine? _

_ Nothing can keep us apart _

_ 'Cause you are the one I was meant to find. _

The last chorus is a slew of small lifts and close contact dips and movements. Cas feels himself smiling, and Dean is grinning right back, both of them completely giving into the moment. 

_ It's up to you, _

_ And it's up to me. _

_ No one can say what we get to be. _

_ And why don't we rewrite the stars? _

_ Changing the world to be ours. _

After the last chorus ends and the small music break happens they come to a stop with foreheads touching, hands clasped at shoulder level, and Cas thinks for a moment he might kiss him. But then the lyrics start up again, and Dean is pulling away, finishing the routine by pulling back, releasing his hands, and turning away from Cas to move across the stage.

_ You know I want you. _

_ It's not a secret I try to hide. _

_ But I can't have you. _

_ We're bound to break and my hands are tied. _

The sound of the audience cheering harshly rips Cas from the spell he fell under, and in a mild panic he turns to make his choreographed exit. His heart is pounding so hard he’s afraid it might rupture, and instead of heading to the green room he stumbles down the back hallway to the bathroom, scrambling to the sink to splash some cold water on his face.

He still has half a dance recital to get through and he’s distracted by the ghost of Dean’s hands on him and his hands on Dean. And it’s fucking stupid because he’s a  _ professional  _ he’s done more routines than he can count.

He takes a few more minutes to compose himself before leaving the bathroom, heading back towards the green room and finding Donna waiting by his things.

“I’m so sorry, traffic fucked me right up. How’d it go?!” she asks eagerly. 

“Fine.” Cas shrugs, grabbing his things for his next number. 

“Oh, that face doesn’t say fine.”

“It’s fine!” Cas snaps. The others around them go quiet and he storms off to the changing room, ready to just forget this whole night ever happened.

  
  


The rest of the recital goes off without a hitch. After all the bows and the applause, Cas changes back into jeans and a shirt, tossing a jacket over top and grabbing his duffle. He manages to avoid talking to anyone on his way out the door, but isn’t so lucky when he reaches the parking lot. Dean’s there, leaning into the door of his car to toss in his own bag, and as he straightens he catches Cas’ eye.

“Cas, hey-“

“You did well tonight, Dean,” Cas says, turning his eyes to the car keys in his hand.

“You were breathtaking.” Dean’s voice has a slight tremor to it, a hesitance. “Look, about the dance-“

“It was just a dance,” Cas shrugs.

“No, no Cas it wasn’t.” Dean moves closer. “We’ve both been doing this too long to believe that.”

“Dean, I’m sorry.” Cas drops his hands to his sides and looks up at Dean, too tired to fight this anymore. “I know you know how I… that every time you ask me out I want to.”

“What’s stopping you?” Dean asks, moving even closer. The chilly December air swirls around them but Cas feels too warm for his jacket.

“Because I’ve had some shit luck in a not so great life, especially when it comes to romance.” He runs a hand through his hair, trying to compose his thoughts in a way that makes sense. “Because dancing is bad enough,” Cas admits. “If my family finds out that I, that we-“ He takes a breath, trying to find the words. “I wouldn’t be allowed to see any of my family ever again, none of them. And while most of them are not the best people, my siblings, my aunt and her children…”

“My father tried to pull the same shit, Cas.” Dean steps even closer, reaching out to take Cas’ hand, warm fingers wrapping around his. “But me and my brother, we found a way. Cas, we could find a way.”

“I’m not as strong as you,” Cas admits. Dean’s breath is a warm cloud against his chin.

“Cas, please, I-“

“Castiel?” Cas jumps away from Dean, spinning to come face to face with his mother.

“I, mom, I didn’t know you’d be here,” he stammers. 

“Obviously,” she scoffs. Dread settles in his stomach. “Your sister mentioned you had a big performance tonight, I thought it might be time I came to see you.” 

“You could have called, I would have made sure you had a seat.” He recognizes the look on her face, and it doesn’t bode well.

“It’s fine, I could see well enough.” Her voice turns cold, as does the set of her shoulders.

“Mom, please-“ Cas moves a step closer to her.

“Don’t. I’ll mail you your gifts, to appease your sisters, but we won’t be needing your company for Christmas.” She wipes at her eyes and spins on her heel.

“Mom, listen, don’t…” Cas barely makes it two steps before stumbling to a halt. Tears in his eyes as he thinks of the disappointment Anna and Anael are going to feel. There’s anger too, at himself, at a lot of things.

“Cas…”

“Leave me alone, Dean.” Cas stumbles to his car, driving away from the worst night of his life.

***

_ Two Weeks Later _

Cas is almost through his first bottle of champagne, the New Year's Eve countdown on the TV not because he’s watching it, but because there’s literally nothing else on to distract him. Naturally the cheap booze he bought on bogo special is weak as fuck, and he’s nowhere near as drunk as he’d like to be. 

“Not even buzzed,” he mutters to himself. He sets the bottle down and stretches out on his couch, staring at the random couple being interviewed in Times Square. He could have had that, and then at least losing contact with his family would have been  _ for  _ something. Instead, he’s sitting here alone, his phone lost somewhere in the mess of his apartment, hating himself.

At least he’s still got something in common with his family. 

Donna gave up calling him a few days ago, and he hasn’t checked any of his other messages to see who else has tried. Why ruin everyone else’s holiday? 

The couple on TV kisses and he’s taken back to that moment of almost in the parking lot. Dean was right there, and Cas wanted it. Still wants it if he’s completely honest with himself. Ever since meeting Dean the man’s done nothing but draw him in like a magnet, both with his dancing and with his conversation. For the first time since his big gay awakening Cas felt comfortable with who he is, because Dean accepted him for it without blinking. 

And then reality sank in, when he asked him on that first date. Cas can’t, couldn’t, would never have that.

“Fuck you,” Cas grumbles at the television, throwing an empty plastic cup at the screen. It bounces off his entertainment center ineffectively, landing with an unsatisfactory flop on the floor. 

Cas is about to give up and crawl into bed in the hopes he’d just pass out when there’s a knock on his door. He glares at it, debating whether it’s worth getting up to answer or if they’d just go away if ignored. The person knocks again, slightly more confidently, and with a groan Cas pushes himself to his feet.

“Alright, coming.” He pulls open the door, not sure what he was expecting, but it definitely wasn’t Dean Winchester with a bottle of the good, expensive champagne.

“Look, just hear me out for a second.” Dean starts speaking in a hurry, like he’s afraid Cas will shut the door in his face. He’s half tempted.

“What are you doing here?” Cas blurts, accusation in his tone even though he’s not sure what he blames Dean for.

“I uh, I was worried about you.” Dean waves the bottle a little with an awkward half smile. “I brought a peace offering.” With a grunt Cas steps back and lets Dean in, unable to bring himself to be ashamed at the state of his apartment. Dean steps around the mess, gracefully refraining from commenting as Cas leads him into the kitchen.

“Pour the booze and say your piece,” Cas grumbles, finding two clean wine glasses in his cupboard. Dean skillfully opens the champagne using his jacket to stop the cork, pouring out a generous portion for each of them. It strikes Cas that he might have done so to purposely drag out the time he’s willing to give Dean to explain himself, but the first sip is delicious enough Cas doesn’t mind.

“I think you’re hurting,” Dean starts, his eyes focused on the glass in his hand. “I think that you’re carrying around a lot of baggage from your ex and your family and there’s a hell of a lot that I  _ don’t _ know about you.” The comment about his ex makes Cas wonder if Donna’s been a bit more loose with his past than Cas would like, but he keeps quiet and gestures for Dean to continue. “But what I know, for a fact, is that I cannot stop thinking about you. Your smile, your focus, your hands on my waist, all of it.” Cas doesn’t realize he’s set his half empty glass down until Dean puts his own, mostly full glass down beside it. “But...I gotta ask. One last time, Cas, tell me no and I’ll walk out of here and never do it again, I swear. I’ll let you go.” The words sound physically painful for Dean to say. “But I- I think I could love you, in all the right ways, and I know I’m not easy to handle but I would try, Cas, as hard as I could to be someone worth it. I just...I need you to let me. Please.” 

Cas is quiet. He can feel the nervous energy coming off of Dean, see the anxious shift in his feet. Seconds tick by in silence and Cas doesn’t open his mouth. There’s a multitude of reasons he should be angry or anxious but for some reason he’s...not. He’s calm, centered, and for the first time in a long time, he's not scared. Dean’s face falls as Cas’ silence lingers, and Cas decides, then and there, he never wants to see Dean’s face look that way again.

He takes a step forward and before Dean can say anything he presses their lips together. It’s not a great kiss, he’s off center and Dean’s mouth is half open on a startled gasp, but it fills Cas with warmth anyway. He pulls away and Dean meets his eyes, his hand moving to take Cas’ waist.

“Really?” he asks softly.

“Really,” Cas confirms with a small smile. “I’m sorry I’ve been so afraid.”

“Hey, it’s okay, Cas. We can talk about it when you’re ready.” Dean pulls him close, his muscled, dancer’s body meeting Cas’ own. “I, uh, was wondering if we could try kissing again. Maybe. If you want.” With a smile, Cas slides his fingers to the back of Dean’s neck and the result is a much more confident, and better reciprocated kiss than the first one.

Neither of them notice the clock hitting midnight.

**Author's Note:**

> Who loves comments? I DO!! XD


End file.
